WHAT TO DO IN AN EMERGENCY

Southall Black Sisters do not provide an emergency or 24 hour service. If you need help out of hours we advise you to contact the Police on 999 or one of the emergency helplines listed below. If we do take your case on within office hours we will continue to work on your case out of hours if necessary to ensure your safety.

Domestic Violence is a Crime. If there has been a violent incident or a threat of violence made against you or someone you know dial 999. If there is not an immediate threat but you wish to report a crime of violence SBS can help you contact the police and we may be able to go with you to the Police station.

A male or female officer may come to see you initially. Most forces have specially trained police officers attached to the Domestic Violence Unit. You should ask the officer for his or her name and badge number. Once the initial risk to your safety is over you can ask to speak with a female officer. The police should also provide you with an interpreter if necessary.

Once you have reported the violence to the Police they will decide whether there is enough evidence to prosecute the person who abused you. Often the Police will ask you if you agree to them prosecuting the person who abused you (pressing charges). If you don’t want the Police to press charges they usually won’t. For more information on being a witness in a criminal prosecution you can contact the police officer dealing with the case, your local domestic violence or community safety unit or Victim Support [0845 3030 9000].

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Domestic violence is physical, psychological, sexual or financial violence that takes place within an intimate or family type relationship and usually forms a pattern of coercive and controlling behaviour.

Approximately 95% of the victims of domestic violence are women and the perpetrator is usually male. Whilst most people normally think of domestic violence as being something one partner does to another, abuse by your own family or your partner/ spouse’s family is also domestic violence.

You can use this list* to help you recognize if you or someone you know is in an abusive relationship.

Forced marriage: family members putting you under physical or mental pressure to marry someone without your free and full consent.

Threats regarding honour: immediate and extended family members, partners and ex partners justifying any of the types of abusive behaviour listed here by saying that you are dishonouring them or bringing shame upon yourself or them.

Disrespect: persistently putting you down in front of other people; not listening or responding when you talk; interrupting your telephone calls; taking money from your purse without asking; refusing to help with childcare or housework.

Breaking trust:lying to you; withholding information from you; being jealous; having other relationships; breaking promises and shared agreements.

Isolation:monitoring or blocking your telephone calls; telling you where you can and cannot go; preventing you from seeing friends and relatives.

Harassment:following you; checking up on you; opening your mail; repeatedly dialling 1471 to see who has telephoned you; embarrassing you in public.

Threats: making angry gestures; using physical size to intimidate; shouting you down; destroying your possessions; breaking things; punching walls; wielding a knife or a gun.

Sexual violence: using force, threats or intimidation to make you perform sexual acts; having sex with you when you don’t want to have sex; any degrading treatment based on your sexual orientation.

Physical violence: punching; slapping; hitting; biting; pinching; kicking; pulling hair out; pushing; shoving; burning;strangling; raping.

Denial: saying the abuse doesn’t happen; saying you caused the abusive behaviour; being publicly gentle and patient; crying and begging for forgiveness; saying it will never happen again.

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If you share a home with the person who is abusing you or you are scared that they will continue to abuse you because they know where you live, you must decide whether you want to leave home for a short while or permanently or keep them out or away from your home.

In an emergency whether you are assisted by an organization or the Police you must make sure you collect your essential belongings, any medication you or your children take and essential documents such as your and your children’s passports, birth certificates and benefit books.

If you have had to leave your children behind in an emergency you should call the Police immediately and ask them to escort you home so you can pick up your children safely. When you return home it is advisable not to get into any conversations with family members still there. If your children are no longer at your home, or your partner and/or his family refuse to hand the children over to you or the Police are not prepared to accompany you seek urgent legal advice. ( See section below on Children).

Alternative Accomodation if you are leaving home

Refuges provide a safe house for women and children who are fleeing violence. Refuges usually provide temporary accommodation for a few weeks until you decide whether it is safe for you to return home or find alternative long term accommodation.

The kind of accommodation that you will be given depends on the refuge, but you will normally be provided with your own room to share with your children, and you will share other spaces such a living room, kitchen and bathrooms with other residents.

You can enter a refuge whether you are single or married, with or without children. Please bear in mind that some refuges have policies about accepting boys between the ages of 11 to 13. If that is the case you must approach the local authority for help.

You can contact your local Women's Aid Refuge by calling the Women's Aid national Domestic Violence 24 hour helpline on 08457 023 468 or Refuge Crisis Line on 0870 599 5443. The Women's Aid Federation Website has a list of its national network of refuges on its website. For this list and information on how to arrange refuge accommodation, what you can take with you to a refuge, funding a refuge space and refuge services go to the "Help" page at the Women’s Aid Federation website. You can also contact refuges through the Samaritans, the police, social services or the Citizen's Advice Bureaux.

If you contact Southall Black Sisters within office hours we can either provide you with telephone numbers of refuges or contact refuges on your behalf.

There are over 250 refuges across the UK.

All refuges in the Women's Aid Network operate an open door policy for women and children in need. However some refuges are able to provide services addressing the particular needs of black and ethnic minority women. For a full list of such refuges contact Women's Aid on their 24 hour helpline. If you are an advisor you can obtain the Women's Aid Gold Book: Directory of Domestic Violence Refuge and Helpline Services from the Women's Aid Federation (tel 0117 944 4411).

Women with immigration problems who are not entitled to benefits may have problems in accessing a refuge. See the section below on women with immigration problems for more information.

Southall Black Sisters do not provide refuge accommodation or any other kind of temporary accommodation.

If you have children your HPU should provide you and your children with temporary accommodation if you have been made homeless as a result of domestic violence. If you do not have children your local authority may not prioritise helping you. If this happens you should seek legal advice. If you are not entitled to benefits due to your immigration status the HPU will not help. See section below on people with immigration problems.

If your local authority fails to refuse to help you, you should seek urgent legal advice on challenging them.

For further information on homelessness and your rights contact the Homelessness Act Team at Shelter on 020 7014 15 or check their website.

If you are unable to access a refuge place or temporary accommodation supportive family and friends may be able to accommodate you and your children until you find somewhere else to live. However be aware that the person who has been abusing you may be able to find you more easily, and friends and family may put you under pressure to talk with your abuser or return to an abusive relationship.

Protection: Staying at home or returning home

You may decide that you do not want to leave home or that you only want to stay away from home until you are sure it is safe to go back. You may be able to obtain an injunction which is a court order preventing your abusive partner or relative(s) from contacting you, harassing you, threatening you or harming you for a specified period. If you share a home with an abusive partner you may be able to obtain an occupation order which is a type of injunction ordering your partner to leave your home and not return for a specified period.

You can obtain emergency injunctions (i.e same or next day) if you can show that you or your children are at immediate risk of physical harm or that your abuser will prevent you from obtaining an injunction if they know you are planning to do this.

You should get legal advice as soon as possible from a family lawyer. You will qualify for legal aid (free legal advice and assistance) if you have no income or are on benefits. If you have a low income the solicitor will calculate whether you qualify for legal aid or you have to pay towards your legal advice costs. If your income is too high you must decide whether you can afford to pay the solicitor privately or if you can apply for an injunction yourself. You should take proof of your income with you ( ie benefits book, letter from benefits agency, last 3 month’s payslips or a letter from anyone who is providing you with free accommodation and support.)

You can also obtain advice and information from Rights of Women on 020 7252 6577 (Tues/ Wed/ Thurs from 2 – 4 p.m. and 7 – 9 p.m., Fridays 12 to 2 p.m.) where free telephone advice is provided by solicitors and barristers on family law issues. You can also obtain a Domestic Violence DIY Injunction handbook in English, Bengali, Gujerati, Hindi and Urdu from Rights for Women for £6.00 which shows you how to apply for an injunction yourself.

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Even if you do not have a permanent right to stay in the UK or British citizenship you have the right to call the Police for protection against violence and to apply for an injunction against your abusive partner. You should also go and see a G.P at the earliest opportunity to get treatment for any injuries, and to report any emotional or physical abuse you have received.

However if your right to be in the UK is dependant upon you staying in your marriage or relationship you will need to seek immediate immigration legal advice. Southall Black Sisters may be able to help refer you to a solicitor or legal advisor if you have not managed to find someone. In order to help you your legal advisor will need to know the following information:

Why you came to the UK (e.g. to join your husband, as a student, domestic worker).

If there are any conditions or restrictions upon you staying in the UK (e.g. that you must stay married or you must not work or claim benefits).

If you have a passport it is very important you try and take this with you when you see the solicitor as most of the above information will be in your passport. Your legal advisor will advise you on what your immigration status is, what rights you have to stay in the UK and what steps if any you can take to remain in the UK, particularly if your are afraid to return to the country you came from.

The rules as to what financial support people with immigration problems are entitled to is complicated. If you cannot work and cannot claim benefits it may be difficult to find a refuge place. If you have children with you, you might be entitled to support and accommodation from Social Services but what you get will depend on your immigration status and the attitude of your local Social Services. We can give you initial advice on what you might be entitled to and try and find a refuge that will provide you with accommodation. If you live in Southall we can help you in ensuring that Social Services provide you with support and accommodation if you qualify for help.

If you have claimed asylum you will be entitled to support and accommodation from NASS (National Asylum Support Service). If you are already an asylum seeker when the violence takes place NASS should pay for you to go to a refuge or other temporary accommodation and help you to move away from your abuser. If you are the dependant of an asylum seeker and your relationship has broken down due to violence you need to seek urgent legal advice on what you should do next.

Links for websites giving practical and legal information on immigration, asylum , financial support and domestic violence:

Asylum Aid or tel: 020 7377 5123.

Refugee Council or tel: 020 7820 3000.

Joint Council for the Welfare of Immigrants or tel: 020 7251 8706.

Refugee Women’s Legal Group or tel: 020 7923 2412.

See our Campaigns page for more information about our campaign to change the law around domestic violence and immigration control and for the right to benefits and other support for women whose relationships have broken down due to violence.

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If someone has already taken your children from you or is threatening to do so call the Police immediately. Child abduction is a criminal offence and will be taken seriously. You should also seek urgent legal advice from a family lawyer. All family lawyers will be able to advise you on what to do if you think your child is still in the UK. However if you believe your child has been taken out of the UK you can contact the Law Society or Reunite for details of lawyers who can give specialist advice on international child abduction. The following information may help the Police to find your child and you should obtain it as quickly as:

>Name, address and contact details of the person you think has taken your child.

Possible addresses and contact details of where your child may be taken abroad (e.g. if you or the person who has taken your child has friends or family abroad)

A recent photograph of your child and of the person you think has taken your child.

If your partner or family members are threatening to get a court order that the children should live with them rather than you this is a matter for the family courts.

In an emergency a court can order a range of people including the person who has taken the child and relatives to tell disclose where a child is, and order the person who has taken a child to return him or her to its main carer. The court can also make an order preventing a specified person(s) from taking a child away from his/her main carer again (Prohibited Steps Order).

If either of the parents make an application to the Court about who the child should live with (Residence Order) or have contact with (Contact Order) the Courts can make orders interim orders about who the child lives with and has contact with whilst the legal proceedings are continuing and final orders if the parents reach an agreement or at a final hearing.

Domestic Violence is an important issue that the Courts have to take into account when deciding who a child should live with and who the child should have contact with. If there are any disputes or legal proceedings about your child you must make sure that your solicitor and the Court know if there is a history of abuse against you or your child.

You may feel that you do not want your abusive partner or ex partner to have contact with your child because this may risk your or your child's safety. You can stop contact but your partner/ex partner may apply to Court for contact. Even if the Court does make an order for contact there are ways of reducing the risk to your and your child's safety when it takes place.

One option is for contact to take place at a contact centre. There is a network of contact centres across the UK most of which are run by volunteers. They usually provide weekly sessions of 1 to 2 hours at weekends where your partner/ex partner can spend time with your child in a supervised or partially supervised setting. There is usually a waiting list of a few weeks before a slot becomes available.

Your child cannot be taken out of the centre without your consent. You do not have to have any contact with your partner/ex partner as you can hand over and collect your child from the contact centre staff. This may be a useful option where you are afraid that your partner/ex partner may take your child away from you or there is a risk of abuse against you or your child. Your solicitor can give you more information about contact centres and make a referral to a contact centre on your behalf.

If someone has hurt your child or is threatening to hurt him/her you should either call the Police or your emergency Social Services Duty Team.

If the person who is abusing your child or is threatening to abuse your child has a contact order you must decide whether it is safe for contact to continue. If there are ongoing legal proceedings to do with your child make sure your solicitor or you tell the Court and any other people involved what is happening and why you want to stop contact.

Rights of Women have fact sheets on residence, contact and parental responsibility that can be downloaded for free from their website.

Reunite: re international child abduction (advice line) 0116 255 6234 or for information see their website.

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Forced marriage is domestic violence and you are entitled to the same protection as any other victim of domestic violence.

If you are being forced into a marriage in this country you can follow the advice given in the rest of this section on what to do in an emergency.

If you fear being taken abroad

If you suspect that you are being taken abroad to be forced into a marriage you can call Southall Black Sisters for advice on what to do to protect yourself or follow the advice in this section.

If you cannot leave home or cannot avoid going abroad leave the following information and items with someone you trust and if possible an agency that could help you with returning to the UK:

Recent photograph of yourself.

Parents' names and their address and telephone number in the UK.

The names and addresses of relatives you are likely to be staying with abroad.

Date you are expected to return to the UK.

Your mobile phone number.

A letter authorizing someone you trust or an organization that can help you to contact the police or foreign and commonwealth office on your behalf.

Before you go abroad make sure you have the following information/items with you:

The address and telephone number of the British High Commission/ Consulate in the country you are visiting which you can find by calling the Foreign and Commonwealth Office on 020 7008 0230 or see their website.

If at all possible take some money with you and a mobile telephone if you have one.

The contact details of the person or organization you have left your details with.

At the airport

Once at the airport if you have any opportunity to speak to any airline staff or police or security make them aware that you are being taken abroad against your will and being forced into a marriage.

Once you are outside of the UK

Once abroad you can contact the nearest High Commission or Embassy. They will try and help you to get back to the UK and can issue you with an emergency passport and provide you with safe accommodation in the country and safe transport back to the UK.

If you are approached by the local police, a local organization or someone from the British High Commission/Consulate ensure that you ask them to see you alone if you can and ask them who has sent them. If you feel that you can trust the official you must tell them that you are being forced into a marriage against your will and would like to return back to the UK. They will try and help you to get back to the UK and can issue you with an emergency passport and provide you with safe accommodation in the country and safe transport back to the UK. You should only tell people who you trust completely about your flight details when you are returning home.

Once back in the UK

You will need to find somewhere safe to stay and you may need protection against family members trying to find you. You can follow the advice in the rest of this section on protection and obtaining legal advice.

If you know someone who is about to forced into a marriage abroad but is still in the UK

If you can contact the person you can give them the information in this section on what to do or you can advise them to call the Police or Southall Black Sisters.

If you know someone who is about to be forced into a marriage abroad and has left the UK

If you don't know where the person has been sent you can still try contacting the Police but be aware family in the UK may alert family abroad. If you have contact details for the person and know where they are abroad you can contact the Police and Foreign and Commonwealth Office (FCO) in the UK and pass on this information to them and your fears about what has happened to the person taken abroad. The FCO will contact their High Commission or Consulate abroad and try and locate the person.

For further information

Foreign and Commonwealth Office for details of British consulates and high commissions abroad and guidance on what to do in forced marriage cases Reunite - re advice and information on abduction of minors (under the age of 18) from the UK call 0116 255 6234 or check their website.

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Below is a list of ways you can find a legal advisor. When you call an advisor to make an appointment check that the firm advises on the area of law you need, that they can give legally aided advice and that they will arrange an interpreter if you need one.

If you are contacting someone for immigration legal advice and they are not a solicitor they are required under law to be registered with the OISC ( Office of the Immigration Commissioner) the body that monitors and regulates the giving of immigration and asylum advice in the UK.

You can call the Law Society on 020 are look at their website for solicitors in your area.

If you have problems with housing and welfare benefits you can contact Citizens Advice Bureaux.

We can recommend advisors for you to contact but there is no guarantee they will be able to take your case on.

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